


Speak Now

by stydianchor



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), Supergirl (TV 2015), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Based on a Taylor Swift Song, F/M, Heavy Angst, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, My First Work in This Fandom, Song: Speak Now (Taylor Swift)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-04
Updated: 2019-05-04
Packaged: 2020-02-23 20:01:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18709012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stydianchor/pseuds/stydianchor
Summary: Caitlin Snow is not the kind of girl who should be rudely barging in on a white veil occasion, but Barry Allen is not the kind of boy who should be marrying the wrong girl.





	Speak Now

**Author's Note:**

> hello there! like i said in the tags, this is kinda my first work in this site and i hope this don't look like crap slfjlsjfpsj  
> also english isn't my native language so if there's any mistake i'm sorry for it!  
> if anybody want to find me in another social midia, my fc on twitter is @damnversjedi and @astronomydanvers in tumblr  
> i hope you enjoy it and if there's any doubt about his oneshot, just ask me in the comments  
> good reading hoes

From the way she knew him, she was not surprised he was late.

To be frank, Caitlin knew Barry like nobody else. She seemed to know him all her life, but he only met him five years ago when her life was a mess. Barry was one of the cops of the team investigating the accident that occurred in her workplace, S.T.A.R. Labs. The accident in the particle accelerator structure led to some fatalities, and Caitlin's fianceé Ronnie was among one of them. The CSI eventually approached her, which slowly let him into her chaotic life. As a result, Barry eventually became Cisco's friend as well, making the trio almost inseparable. Whenever there was time, the three of them went to the Jitters, and spent hours chatting away, and then she came to know him better.

She began to realize the way his eyes sparkled when he talked about his work, realized how he knew every word of every song in La La Land, noticed that he ran his hand over the back of his neck when he was nervous, and realized that reading the emotions on his face of Barry became a common thing for her, since she spent so much time watching him.

Not that she was obsessed with him to know all this, she was just too observant.

Barry was with her in her most difficult times, so it would be selfish that she was not at his wedding just because she'd done the stupid thing to let him go. And just by knowing him well, she knew that he loved his bride.

And there she was, at the entrance of the church, wondering if she had dodged a bullet or lost the love of her life. The brown orbs of the brunette watched the forensic scientist run to the altar after realizing that the bride had already arrived. He was late even for his own wedding, which would be comical if it weren't tragic. Barry's eyes darted past her, and she lifted her hands and her thumbs in a gesture of encouragement, although the smile on her lips was forced.

Caitlin passed by the entrance of the church, and entered the temple discreetly. There were two seats in the corner seat, near a curtain-draped column, which was perfect for her: no people around to face her unhappiness as she drowned in her own pity. With a sigh as she sat down, Snow listened to some angry murmurs and frowned.

"... I'm going to kill him, I swear to... I'M FREAKING CALM, FELICITY!"

At the last scream, Caitlin grimaced and imagined the area that would be in the next room, she would hate to be in Felicity's skin now. Trying to be distracted, the brunette shifted her gaze to the altar, where she visualized the family of Iris dressed in pastel, even poor Jenna was suffocating in a dress almost twice times bigger than her, which made the doctor laugh.

That was certainly not what Barry had expected.

One of the guitarists exchanged a few gestures with one of the wedding organizers, and soon some symphony that looked like a death march began to ring in the room. Everyone stood to see the bride, and Caitlin sat up, the day was bad enough and she did not want to exchange strange looks with Iris, let alone try to feign excitement again.

Iris was beautiful, that was undeniable. That smile and charisma could win anyone, but it seems she was the only one who did not have the grace to be friends with West, since the journalist saw her as a threat to her relationship with Barry, or at least Caitlin choose to believe it. Something in her subconscious made her think that Barry really wanted her to be in Iris's shoes, but that thought just made her laugh. Iris was just perfect, even Caitlin would like to date her.

The bride walked down the hall, smiling and nodding at everyone, looking like a pageant queen, though the white dress reminded the doctor strongly in the shape of a cupcake.

"Stop staring, it's getting creepy." Her eyes went wide and she almost screamed in alarm, Caitlin looked away and took a deep breath, feeling her heart pounding.

"Goddamn it, Ralph. What the hell?"

"Seriously, you were staring at her so hard that didn't even saw me coming."

"You should thank God that no one saw you, Ralph. I know very well you're here as a gatecrasher." She mumbled nervously, and settled into her chair when she realized that they had all sat down again, and now Iris was at the altar, facing Barry and holding hands with him.

The priest began to recite the wedding mass, which to her were empty words that were crushing his heart each time the pontiff spoke about true love and all that nonsense bullshit. She tried to ignore the grip on her chest, and she swallowed the urge to cry, even if her eyes burned with the strength she did to not let the tears run down her face.

She should've been okay with it, she'd already accepted that Iris could give him all that he deserved, and she could never give. Caitlin had learned that loving is wanting the happiness of the person she loves, and she loved him enough to let him go. She often wondered if that was the right decision, but every time Barry smiled at Iris, she confirmed more and more that his happiness came first before any feeling she had for him.

"You have no idea what the hell you're doing, do you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, Ralph." She murmured, swallowing dryly.

"Young people, so complicated..." The other said rolling his eyes, and Caitlin snorted.

"You're two years older than me, Dibny, do not bother." He replied with a tone of bitterness, but sighed then and smiled sadly. "Don't you see how happy he is? I can't ruin it."

"As you drown in a pit of bitterness, he has looked at you four times and you haven't even noticed."

Ralph's response seemed to be enough to silence her then, and she realized he wasn't lying. Barry looked at her the next moment, and then she noticed the indecision in his expression.

"He knows, doesn't he?" she asked in her voice almost breaking, her mask was beginning to fall and she was on the verge of despair.

"I know you know the answer."

Barry knew. He knew, and as much as she tried denying it, her subconscious was right, but she strongly doubted he would do anything to change that. That selfless idiot would never leave Iris at the altar, loving her as a friend, girlfriend, or whatever they would be if all that bullshit came to an end. And even if the situation screamed the contrary, Caitlin began to repeat a mantra in her mind:

_Don't say yes._

_Don't say yes, you moron!_

"... And if anyone opposes this marriage, speak now or forever hold your peace!" The priest said, and for a moment, the church was in an uncomfortable silence, and with it, Caitlin's last chance.

"Don't say yes." Caitlin murmured to herself, catching Ralph's gaze.

"Time is passing, Snow, just freaking say it!" Dibny murmured tense, and slightly nervous.

"Don't say yes!" She said louder, but still not loud enough to be heard.

"Then let's go to the vows..." the priest continued, he had not heard her.

"Don't say yes!" Caitlin spoke loudly enough this time, drawing everyone's attention.

Horrified looks from everyone in the room fell on her, but her brown eyes only stared at Barry's green orbs, though Iris's killer look was also on her. Caitlin stood up with shaking hands, hating the situation, and hating even more having to do it in front of all those people.

"Caity?" Barry asked in surprise, but there was some relief in his face.

"I won't even bother myself to apologize, because I'm not sorry." She said directly to Iris, then turned her gaze to Barry. "The only thing I regret is that it took me so long to say that. I love you, God, I love you. And I tried not to say it, I swear I tried! Because she would make you 100% happier than I ever could. And all of this had to happen so I could I realized how stupid I was. Because maybe in this lapse of selfishness, I realized that I would never be happy without you, no matter how much Felicity and Kara told me that someday I would be happy too."

When they heard the mention of their names, both blondes coughed in synchrony as they realized that Iris's expression was even more angry, and that now she was staring at them both.

"And perhaps I have ruined our friendship with this dramatic monologue, but something in me still trusts you to feel the same for me, a stupid part because it's crystal clear that you love her. So I'm sorry for the confusion, but I couldn't remain silent. At least not anymore." Caitlin finished and took a deep breath, since she was out of air because of the hurry of her own words, and if she didn't said it fast enough, she knew she would lose the courage to say all the things that needed to be said.

"And-I-" Barry stuttered, looking between the bride and Caitlin. "I'm sorry."

The whisper turned out to be confusing, since he had looked away, not knowing what to do. Iris forced a nervous laugh, and put her hand on the groom's chin, forcing him to make eye contact with her.

"What did you said?"

"I said I'm sorry, Iris. But I can't."

Releasing Iris's right hand, Barry sighed and left the altar, not daring to look back. The brunette's expression split between shock, sadness, anger, and confusion. Barry rushed out to the back of the church, reaching for Caitlin and ignoring the judging looks on both of them, and the animated shrieks that Cisco, Felicity, and Kara tried to hide miserably.

"Let's run away. Now." He begged her, swallowing hard, but she held his hand tightly and they ran away, far away. They both ran like crazy, but their hands were holding each other as a guarantee that they would never part again.

" _Stop doing that, Cisco! It won't help at all..."_

_"She has been like this for five minutes, maybe one hour she finally reacts!"_

The apprehensive voices reached Caitlin's ears, who stopped running and suddenly, everything around her began to disappear. The church parking lot, the pain in his feet from running with heels, and even the adrenaline rushing through her veins. Everything was gone, and along with everything, he was gone too.

She just felt...

_Empty._

It was like coming back from a trance, she was in exactly the same place as before. Sitting in the back of the church, with the same overwhelming sensation that haunted her body as she stepped on that spot. Blinking in confusion, Caitlin glanced around, listening to several murmurs of relief from her friends that she was back, which only worsened her confusion, since they shouldn't even be there.

Looking again, she realized that the hand she held was not Barry's, but actually Cisco's, who was staring at her with pity, almost as if she were glass and could break at any moment.

"Why the hell are you here? Iris will kill you if you see y'all here!" She frowned, but realized seconds after that the church was empty now, and that only they were there. "Wait, where's everyone?"

"Caitlin, don't..." Kara started, but stopped when she realized that she had done exactly what she would advise her not to do. "...Don't look back." She finished in frustration, and sighed.

After looking at the church entrance, Caitlin really wished that Kara had finished the sentence earlier.

They were there, looking happier than ever, exchanging smiles and looks as the guests threw rice over the newly-married.

It was all a daydream. A reverie where she had the guts for five seconds, and glimpsed what her future would look like if she had gone over her fears and told the truth. An illusion that the doctor's brain invented so she could do what needed to be done.

But in reality, she never got up, never interrupted the marriage, and now it was too late.


End file.
